Blog 10-Poetry by Me

WHY GO JUDGE NOW?

Why do you Judge me?

You cannot see inside my mind.

Why do you judge me?

You have no idea what I have left behind.

Why do you judge me?

Am I walking to close to your line?

Why do you judge me?

I do not take what is not mine.

Why do you judge me?

Do I take away from your time?

Go ahead and judge me if you must.

I will not bend or bust.

Go ahead and judge me if you must.

In my heart, I know I am worthy of your trust.

Go ahead and judge me if you must.

But I am not just a victim to lust.

Go ahead and judge me if you must.

But I will not crumble like dried crust.

Go ahead and judge me if you must.

Though you know as well as I do our system is not just.

Go ahead and judge me if you must.

We will not allow tears to make us rust.

Now that your judgment has been cast,

Have you realized that my life you have not changed?

Now that your judgment has been cast,

Can you see that my life, you have not rearranged?

Now that your judgment has been cast,

Do you still believe that I have mange?

Now that your judgment has been cast

Are my requests really all that strange?

Now that your judgment has been cast,

Will your false opinion have a long term range?

Now that your judgment has been cast,

Perhaps you have realized we can make a peaceful exchange.

The peace will not last however, you will judge again.

You do not know how to move beyond your training.

The peace will not last however, you will judge again.

You cannot erase a lifetime of culture painting.

The peace will not last however, you will judge again.

You have been pressured to keep up the hating.

The peace will not last however, you will judge again.

Yet the culture you are fighting is not fading.

The peace will not last however, you will judge again.

Yes judge us, but we are done waiting.

The peace will not last however, you will judge again.

It is our future we are creating.

But while the judgment circle keeps spinning.

Know that we are strong.

But while the judgment circle keeps spinning.

Know that we have already been waiting too long.

 But while the judgment circle keeps spinning.

Know that wherever you are is where we belong.

But while the judgment circle keeps spinning.

Know that we have created a strong bond.

But while the judgment circle keeps spinning.

Know that someday you will be writing our song.

But while the judgment circle keeps spinning.

But most of all KNOW that being  WHO YOU ARE is not wrong.

Blog 9 – Mind Your Sex

After reading about culture this week and some of the events that our going on in our media and behind the scenes; I am feeling rather frightened and disgusted. Yes, I am older and I know that sexuality is not a brand new issue but I had never given it much attention until now. More and younger women are using their bodies to sell themselves. Not in the sense of prostitution; though some may compare it to this, but more in the reality of what we see every day on our televisions or hear on our radios and in our music and please do not forget our video games and computers. The female body is rapidly becoming what sells anything; so why would a girl not expose herself for thirty seconds in hopes that she is the next one selling you that Corvette. Apparently, not many are too concerned about being used in this way and for some obscure reason they think it is giving us power. Yes sex gives us power over most male species but is this truly the power we want represented? The answer for me is NO; I would prefer we loosen our clothes a little, cover more skin and walk with our heads held high. We have come a long way and sex has not gotten us there, intelligence has. Yes be proud of your body but be prouder of your mind. If we do not change; we will become victims of our own crimes and at the end of the day, no man will take us seriously.

Blog 8 – Power and Prostitution

Women’s studies this week has centered my thoughts around power and sex. Women have been striving toward total independence in the home and work place for decades but most recently there seems to be a movement brewing that is concerned with the right for us to use our body as a source of pleasure and income. I suppose this is a goal for the majority of people; to be able to make money doing something we thoroughly enjoy. If women choose to sell sex as a way to achieve satisfaction in their life, why do we want to constantly deny that right? Personally, this would not be a choice for me because my brain is much more attractive than my body and it is my preference to use it over the power I could have as a sexual object of desire. However, there are women who choose to have sex in order to live, while others are forced into sex slavery because they have no alternative. I believe that I am in support of decriminalizing prostitution and providing these women with legislation that provides them with protection and all the rights that comes with “honest” employment. I use the term honest here just to demonstrate the fact that people tend to associate prostitution with drugs and crime and not being a true means of earning a living but this is not the sole truth of the matter and anyone who takes the time to really understand these women will see that they feel the job they are doing is honest work. Perhaps people are afraid that making prostitution legal would only increase the power we are gaining in the business world. God knows sex is one power we will always have over men.

Blog 7 – Family, Marriage & Exploitation

I have had a crazy week and there have been several issues in and out of my mind this week but I am having trouble concentrating on just one topic. Our class readings this week were about family, marriage and exploitation. I find it morbidly funny that my mind can actually make a connection between all three of these topics. Of course family and marriage can easily be put together if taken at face value. But if you try to break down the words and define them while attaching them to every type of relationship you know exists today; I think you will find that the two being tied together is much trickier under the surface. Now take what you know of children and women being exploited and think in the frame set of someone who is poor and just wanting to be loved. If you are a family member, say a mother and someone offers to “make your daughter’s life so much better” you become overwhelmed with the prospects of happiness for her and believe she will be married and live a better life than you can give her. The problem is though, the girl never gets married and becomes a servant and is perhaps beaten daily. Now you have the three terms entirely connected but there is no feeling of harmony. A family lost a child, a man got a cheap slave through exploitation, and what the hell, and marriage was only needed for thought. I wish I could paint a prettier picture for you but this is where the things I have read and felt this week has led me.

Blog 6 – Abortion

This week, abortion seems to be the topic I have read about and discussed the most. I am going to use my blog time this week to share with my readers my opinion on abortion. Remember it is my opinion based merely on my own observations and what I have studied about the subject. I am not a professional.

I do not believe women should have abortions in cases except in cases where the result of her pregnancy is the result of rape, incest, she knows beyond any reason of a doubt the child could never have a normal life or be severely deformed, having the baby could kill her and in situations where lack of proper contraception has been repeatedly denied.

Having said all that I believe it is important to address the issue of punishment for women who still have abortions and did not become pregnant or have any of the problems listed above. Personally, though I would not support them, I would not judge them either. I do not feel it is my job or anyone else’s to tell other women what she can and cannot do with her body. To make abortion illegal and put women who have them, because you know it will still happen, in jail would just be another example of our government wasting our tax dollars.

The way I see it, if abortion is wrong in the eyes of a spiritual power then the ones involved will receive whatever punishment that power deems necessary when the time comes. I do not believe in a punishing spiritual power myself because we have been given free will for a reason and I seriously doubt it is so we can make a wreck of our lives and then punished in the end.

Too many women have died, been self banished from society, made permanently sterile and shunned by society. It is time to just let go of the whole issue, allow women to abort if this is their factual, completely informed decision. Do not make laws against it that will force women back into back alley clinics where they will be torched, perhaps raped and killed. Let abortions be done in proper facilities by professionals. And for God sakes since we know it is going to keep happening use the aborted fetuses for scientific research.

Blog 5

In view of our studying the image of a woman’s body this week mixed with the usual contrary subjects such as imperfection and ism’s we have given in our society; I am thinking about my own body and conversations I have had with friends on the subject. I have been avoiding looking at myself in the mirror for several years now. Not that I could really see myself well because of my visual disadvantages but I know from feel that I do not think I would like the look of my body. I had a friend comment last week, “I am glad you are realistic,” when I commented on how her body shape was great for her age. Instead of typical womanly comparison to see who was looking better; we celebrated in the coma rotary of aging as we are meant. And though we feel and this act this confident at times; I believe all women go through at least one moment of their day where they are uncomfortable about something with their body. I know I do. I have another friend who is going through cancer treatments and has lost all of her hair. One day when she picked me up for girls night out she said, “I am sorry and I hope you don’t mind but I didn’t feel like putting on my hair today.” I personally thought this was the cool thing in the world to be able to choose your level of comfort and frustration over getting ready to go out. Yet I also seen the side of my friend that cares about what society thinks and felt she should apologize for what she was experiencing because her appearance was not normal. We will we ever be happy with just who we are?

Blog 4

Due to our readings this week for class; I have been thinking a lot about my sexual orientation. Our readings have been focusing on homosexuality and the related issue of homophobia. Lesbian, gays and bisexuals have stigmatized because we are often misunderstood. If I ask another woman out for a drink who knows that I am a lesbian; often I am rejected because of homophobia. I constantly remind myself that people cannot help reacting this way because our society has inbreed this fear into them. For the record here I would like to set something straight. Just because I ask you to join me for coffee, I do not want to go to bed with you nor would I act in anyway inappropriate to your own sexual orientation. I would ask of you the same respect in return. I truly believe people are born with a gender, sex and a sexual orientation. Gender is who we feel we are either male or female, not necessarily what our body looks like. Sex is the biological aspect of our body; we either have a penis or a vagina or both. Sexual orientation is the sex or sexes we physically, romantically, and intellectually attracted to. Many of us have grown up going through the stages of confusion, confrontation, denial and hopefully acceptance. Now if we could just be more accepted by society, maybe it would be possible for us to enjoy the same romantic love displayed in so many novels and movies. Because no matter what our gender, sex or orientation; everyone just wants to be loved.

Blog 3

T

his week I am thinking about sexual harassment and date rape drugs. It seems to me that if you are a half way decent looking woman; and sometimes this is not even necessary, you cannot go out to a bar without being harassed by men. Why is this? Even if we dress in our holey old clothes it happens. Las week a close friend of mine went out with her sister to celebrate her upcoming wedding. They had not even been in the bar for five minutes before a group of guys started hitting on my friend.  She made it clear to them that she was not interested but they would not leave her alone. (Okay guys who might read this, no means no, have you forgotten?) After in during this for about fifteen my friend tried to move away from them but they followed her and somehow managed to drug her drink. God only knows where she would be today if her sister had not noticed them trying to get her out the front door. Not understanding what had happened, her sister just put my friend and drove home thinking perhaps she had had too much to drink. The next day however they discussed the incident and my friend had only one beer. So, tell me what did she do to deserve being treated this way?

The only thing she is guilty of is being a good looking woman. This type of harassment needs to stop. Men need to know we are not just out here for them to do with and treat as they please. I wonder what men would do if we started drugging them when they do not act like we want or expect them to act. Please do not misunderstand me; I know not all men are like this and that there are women out there already drugging men, you just do not hear about that as often. I just wish it could be safe and harassment for my friends and me when we go out. Unless more women start standing up and saying “NO” to this type of behavior, it will never happen.

BLOG 2

This week in my women’s issues class we are discussing feminism and the various meanings associated with the word. I would just like to take the time here to let people know that I am not one to get caught up on words. I mean really, words are just words, what they truly mean and how they can help or hinder is the way you interpret them. If you are one who believes the word feminism means you hate men, then you know if you believe that or not and from there you can decide if the word fits you. But this is where you have to be careful because there are usually numerous definitions in your head for every word you have ever spoken. Take my advice here and if you hear a word you have not heard before, do not just Google or Wikipedia it; you must define every word with various sources of information, only in the way can you truly know what a word means to you. I attend a weekly meeting that closes with the words “take what you like and leave the rest”; I try to apply this to my life daily. I realize I have gotten away from the subject of feminism, yet I felt it important for you to know more of me before I gave you my interpretation.

Personally, I have never been called a feminist. Frankly though I would not care because there are elements in the readings that I have been going through that make me realize that I am a feminist in several ways if this is the label you choose to give me. I believe in equal rights for everyone, not just women. I believe in equality for all women, children, men and whatever other labeled genders and species we have roaming our land. I am grateful for all the women in history who have given their life’s work in order for me to be where I am today.

Blog 1

What can I say about my son Donaven Christopher Lee  in one million words or less? One thing I can tell you is I did not expect him returning home from his first day in 8th grade and inform me that I had homework. I still had a week before my courses started. Yet here we are a week later I am just now doing my homework assignment from last week. Thank God Donaven does not procrastinate when it comes to doing school work; normally I do not either but I still wanted my extra week off.

I call Donaven D-man or just D most of thetime. D came into the world at 1:52 pm on April 12th 1996. When he was first born he was not breathing and blue. The nurses took him from me and frantically worked on him until an eternity later; I heard a cry. The cry was the most beautiful sound I ad ever heard. After that first cry, he did not cry much. Donaven was a great baby; rarely id he fuss, puke or pee on me. By one years old he couldn’t walk and barely crawled but he was speaking in nearly full sentences. At two years old his favorite word to say to me was “actually”.  At age three he read his first word off of a building in Seattle, Washington, Fox. He attended pre-school for two years; during which time he charmed everyone who wrked with him. Also during his third year of life he decided he was no longer going to take anymore naps.

He attended Madison Elementry school from Kindergarten to sixth grade. He was always on the Honor Roll and working as a teacher’s pet. Oh yeah, when he was in the second grade; he began dressing in a button up shirt and green blazer and announce he was the FBI. He also played chess and participated in Ed-Com for two years.

Once he hit the seventh grade, still a charmer, he suddenly grew taller than me and enjoys rubbing it in. I believe it was also the same year he elected himself chairman of the Squirrel Lovers Association. He also fell in love with a puppy and lost her during this time. He has such a gentle way with animals that I hope he works with them in the future. Somehow D managed to get over his loss and found he had enough love in his heart for anothe puppy plus my Leader Dog.

Now he s in the eighth grade and kisses me on the forehead good-bye as he walks out the door to school.. A reminder of how quickly they grow and change. But there are few things about D that I don’t think he will ever change. Number one, he is a bit messy to say the least. He tries to keep things picked up sometime but since he rarely gets rid of anything, he has a lot of clutter. Number two, he will always be a gentle loving soul. Number three, h would do about anything for anyone, he is just that type of person. Now I could go on but I only have a million words so I better wrap this up before I get carried away. One last thought Donaven; I do not know if he will ever give up that unibrow!